Momma Jon't Know Dack!

My life with a miswired brain, a home business, and a 2-yr old.

I’m falling apart!


Sorry loves! I know I haven’t been on for a few days, and it’s because I’m falling apart! I’ve been super busy and super tired and I have a super whiny child…it all makes me just want to sleep for a few fucking days.

Anyway, today I’m going to post about my business venture, Damsel in Defense. Image

I went to a party about a month and a half ago where my friend, Eliza, said I’m doing a Damsel in Defense home party, you have to come…I was like, oh god, I love you, but I fucking hate home parties, dude! She simply stated, ‘Trust me, this is different” I’m already imagining some hag trying to push me into buying an expensive stun gun or pepper spray or whatever and they don’t work well.

I arrive to the party and much to my dismay I’m already loving it because of the color scheme, hot pink, black and zebra print,Image WHAAATTT???? Yeah, I know, I’m lame, but I’m also a girl…so bite me. and yes, I designed the card myself and I KNOW it’s kickass. I took advantage of that $5 for 500 business cards that UPS had going on…I can’t wait until they do that again!!!

Anyway, The Independent Damsel Pro (that’s also MY title ;-)), Kerri, starts her shpeel and I’m drawn in, she’s quoting statistics for how often women are attacked, and how many of them were unable to defend themselves…it was kinda scary. Then I saw the Junk In The Trunk….Imagewhat is that you ask? Its a car HER-mergency kit that includes black and pink jumper cables…for REAL!!!!! ctfu…I’m sold, at the end of the party I tell the lady I want to join her…she’s overjoyed and during the following week I order my kit.

That day I joined Damsel in Defense because not only is it about Equipping, Empowering and Educating women on how to defend themselves and take care of themselves in emergencies, but also because this world is getting crazy! ANNNDDD I’m also the ONLY representive in my neck of the woods for about 150 miles in any direction 😀

So I’m rambling on, I know. I just had to get this out there. There are options besides guns, I DO have my conceal carry but damn if you can’t carry this bad boy everywhere….Image then I will carry these….ImageImageImage and yes, i do have all those pepper sprays!

Nifty thing about our stun guns is that they have 7.5 million volts of electricity. That’s awful damn high if you consider that cops taser guns are only 70,000….. all of our stun guns, too come with a lifetime guarantee!!! Awesome. As for our pepper sprays, they are all 2 million scoville heat units…OUCH!!!! They also all have a special UV marker that when a black light is passed over everyone’s face in a line up, you’re attacker will stand out like a Jackson Pollock painting…like this…Image pretty cool huh? I’m doing playing the pushy sales woman, but I DO have to promote one more thing….my side job. I took it upon myself to be a little crafty…and I made an Etsy shop the name pretty much sums it up. I’m doing some nifty things with bullet casings 🙂Image Who knew I was this artsy fartsy, huh?? and still coming up with more ideas and can even take requests!

Thank you all for reading my blog today. I hope you all click on my link above to check out Damsel in Defense. We need to protect our loved ones! and don’t forget to check out my Etsy page! I will make some bullet art for you, too 😉

Enjoy the beautiful weather,

Love, Momma


Author: Momma Jon't Know Dack

Well...I'm! With a home business, a 2 yr old son, Jack, and an inability to speak without sounding like a drunk. I call it verbal dyslexia... i take the beginning of two words and mix them up, like "that bunk is jad" instead of "that junk is bad". I aim for lots of laughs, lots of love and lots of posts of my superly awesome sauce days. No doubt you'll enjoy. Love, Momma

6 thoughts on “I’m falling apart!

  1. Ok, this is awesome! Now I am going to have to follow the links because we’ve not heard of this in my little corner of the world, and what a terrific idea! So yeah…Now I’m going to have to follow your blog, because in addition to the cool content factor, you are a fun read!

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